Have you ever read a book or listened to someone tell a story and found yourself becoming completely immersed in the words, feeling as if you were actually living it? A good storyteller takes control of the story, and decides how they want to tell it based on the way they want the audience to feel.
Now let’s relate this to life. We all have stories. Some stories are happy; full of joy and memories that make you smile. Some stories are sad; full of trauma and heartbreak. No matter what kind of story you have, take a minute to think about the way you tell it to other people. Are you wanting them to be sad or happy when they hear your story? Are you wanting them to feel sorry for you, be amazed by you, comment on how strong you are? Remember that the way that you tell your story is going to affect the way that they see you and the way they feel while spending time with you. Now let’s switch gears again and think about the way you tell your story….to yourself. Are you the hero or the victim? Do you spend more time in the happy parts or the sad parts? What is the main theme of your story?
My point is…one of the first steps to healing is realizing that you are the author of your own story. Maybe you can’t control everything that happens in your story, but you can control how you react to it. I spent many years allowing the heartaches and hardships of my life to control who I was and how I viewed myself. I was letting other people narrate my story. I was letting the words and actions of other people tell me my worth, the way I should be treated, and what my path should be; and the funny thing was, I didn’t even realize it. And then one day I was sitting alone in my living room. I was single, my children had moved into their own homes, and I had no idea what to do with myself. I had no one to take care of, no one to tell me what they needed me to do. I had this revelation that all of my life I had been existing…not living. It was time for me to take the scariest step of my life and take back my story.
I’m not going to lie, it wasn’t easy, and some days its still a struggle. Thankfully I stumbled upon Jay Bradley and Breathwork and that helped to rewire my brain. I had to learn to tell myself that I was worth it, that I deserved to live my life the way I wanted to. I had to learn that its ok to be selfish sometimes and do what’s best for me. I had to learn to change my thinking and try to find the positive in each day, sometimes each moment. Slowly I began to take my story back, ending the negative chapters and leaving those events and characters behind; and folding the corners of the pages that made me smile so that I could revisit them when I needed to. Healing is an ongoing process, I work at it every day. I continue to write my story my way. And I choose to share my experience with others and feel blessed when I can be a part of their healing journey. If you choose to remember anything from my story, let it be this:
It doesn’t matter if you have to start over, as long as you start. It doesn’t matter how small the step is, as long as you take it. It doesn’t matter what happened last week, yesterday, or even one minute ago…because at any given moment you can take a deep breath and tell yourself:
“MY STORY STARTS RIGHT NOW….”
Much love,
Sandy